(OPINION) It was the day of New York City’s Pride March in 2017, and I had just arrived in the city from South Africa at the age of 22.

I decided to attend an evening church service at a well-known megachurch because I’d heard great things about their services in the Hammerstein Ballroom. Standing in line to get inside, I befriended a student from Kansas and surveyed the people around us who were also waiting.

Queer men and women stood in line with us dressed in rainbow colors, holding flags and chatting about the church service that was about to begin. I remember being so amazed that gay people were welcome at this church, and that they were comfortable enough to be so open about their sexuality.

Part of me felt jealous. I yearned to stand beside them and wave a pride flag, declaring that I, too, was queer. That I was bisexual and that I was proud.

I wondered if the following year, I’d attend the Pride March with these new queer friends I’d made at church. It made me hopeful that my acceptance of my own sexuality was the first step in being accepted by a church community.

I was immediately welcomed with open arms by the greeters inside and by the hosts that showed us to our seats on the balcony. I waited in anticipation for the service to start until eventually an older man walked onto the stage and began to preach.

He talked about how being gay was a sin and how our “liberal and progressive society” was ruining the sanctity of marriage by legalizing gay marriage. I was stunned. I watched as those around me began nodding their heads and I heard the occasional “Preach, pastor!”

The student beside me, the one from Kansas, didn’t move a muscle. Then, I watched as people from the crowd got to their feet and left the auditorium, some shaking their heads and others even crying.

The pastor continued to preach and I sat there, unable to move but not wanting to listen to another word he said. I felt so angry. I couldn’t believe how naive I had been to believe that this church would embrace the LGBTQ+ community. That this church would embrace me. READ MORE